Was going say that I'm surprised no one actually told you since I was there earlier, but then I realize the only one who knows we know each other is Booker, so they probably have no clue what you're doing.
[ gonna pick up the phone. Sounds a little confused, like he soorrrt of gets this might be a loaded set of questions and he should answer truthfully but also at the very least carefully to not upset the other but... he also too stupid to really know what the upset would be from in the first place so he just goes with honesty. ]
S...ooo... I was never planning to tell you about my shoulder unless you asked. And, I was going to tell you about where I was the next time we made plans.
Okay, don't take this the wrong way, but how come?
[ if it wasn't for Sam's completely innocent tone like he's a kid asking why he can't go off on his own before learning about stranger danger, this could come off defensive or otherwise challenging, but he is definitely simply confused and surprised why anyone would want to know about it.
Because I want to know what’s happening to you. Because I care. So I can make sure to not accidentally injure you more and so I can understand what you’ve been going through better.
Ahaha, sorry. I wasn't trying to hide it or anything. I didn't even get to tell anyone in Cirrus until I saw them... I also didn't mean to run off so fast on you without coming back. I was and am really really glad you're okay and I wanted you to see at least you didn't have to worry about me having went through what Cirrus did since I hadn't told you, yet.
...Just didn't want to directly alert you that something bad must have happened to Cirrus while trying to reassure you that I was one less to worry about also being like that for when you did find out. That's tough to see for anyone, especially people you like, and I know at least one person on there is personally important to you. I've seen worse done to corpses, but ... [ long sigh ] that's still up there even when done to strangers and you've been conditioned to see such things.
I needed to step back for a minute and couldn't be there if you got overwhelmed. Sorry. I was trying not hit you with that trauma blindsided.
I know you'll be upset if something happens to me, and I don't want that. I know others will be, too, but even if they weren't, knowing you would be is enough for me to not want to be the cause of that.
...But, between you and me... I still feel like this time I abandoned them.
[ Thankfully they're all alive because no one can die, but as someone who has immense survivor's guilt, the idea bothers him. ]
I know. But, I also hit the button. And... even if I knew it was Cirrus that would get punished, I wouldn't have hesitated because I had been so sure, at least, Cirrus and Siren's would absolutely push their buttons, too, out of everyone.
You can still care about them even if you swapped families. I know Siren's would still care for me even if I swapped and vice versa. I mean...I still care about Forge and Forge still cares about me.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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Can't knock? Or did you forget which one I'm in?
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I'm not an Atmosphere anymore.
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So when were you going to tell me you broke your shoulder and also are Disorder now?
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S...ooo... I was never planning to tell you about my shoulder unless you asked. And, I was going to tell you about where I was the next time we made plans.
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[ if it wasn't for Sam's completely innocent tone like he's a kid asking why he can't go off on his own before learning about stranger danger, this could come off defensive or otherwise challenging, but he is definitely simply confused and surprised why anyone would want to know about it.
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Because I want to know what’s happening to you. Because I care. So I can make sure to not accidentally injure you more and so I can understand what you’ve been going through better.
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Wait... wait...How are you going to injure me more?
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Oh?! Have I been upgraded into the spontaneous-aggressive hugs club, you say?
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1/2
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...Just didn't want to directly alert you that something bad must have happened to Cirrus while trying to reassure you that I was one less to worry about also being like that for when you did find out. That's tough to see for anyone, especially people you like, and I know at least one person on there is personally important to you. I've seen worse done to corpses, but ... [ long sigh ] that's still up there even when done to strangers and you've been conditioned to see such things.
I needed to step back for a minute and couldn't be there if you got overwhelmed. Sorry. I was trying not hit you with that trauma blindsided.
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...But, between you and me... I still feel like this time I abandoned them.
[ Thankfully they're all alive because no one can die, but as someone who has immense survivor's guilt, the idea bothers him. ]
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Except... I was wrong.
[ the way he says it has that unspoken: again. ]
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I should know better than anyone by now how this works.
But, anyway, it's not really fair of me to discuss their affairs like I have a right to their business, anymore, either. Sorry.
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